When I asked these questions I didn't get much of a response from t that I could believe. I went looking for myself and read lots of books. I landed on the neuroscience of psychotherapy and this I can believe. From that stand point, one of the things that long term psychotherapy (talk therapy) does is work to provide you with experiences that cause neurological changes in your brain and how neurological messages are transmitted. The key here is that you have to be working with someone that works for you - it is all about the relationship between you and t, and what that relationship does with or helps with when you talk about things that make you uncomfortable.

Ok I just summarized about 1000 pages of heavy duty reading in a few sentences, so please realize there is much more to that belief/theory/narrative. I believe in it whole heartily and have dug in to do the work because I found someone that works for me. I no longer question if what I talk about matters, or what this is doing, or why of that... I just talk about what filters up from the depths and allow the emotions and feelings of our relationship do it's magic.

If you would like some reading material, I can look up the books again.