I often find myself in one sided conversations with my parents. I let them do all the talking because I've learned that it's not worth it bringing up my thoughts. They're just going to say they don't agree with me and that I need to do it their way.

Last night I found myself falling into the pattern of listening to my mom explain to me why I need to study all day on Christmas Eve after I told her I planned to study for a half day and visit my boyfriend in the evening.

I didn't say anything to stand up for myself. Nothing about being stressed and burned out. Nothing about how I hated it when she nags me and that it brings me down to hear her disapproval all the time. Nothing about how I have my study plan already scheduled and I had built in enough buffer time to take a break.

I just nodded silently and went back to my room to cry. It must have been an hour of intense crying. Needless to say, I got no studying done. I also made sure to cry silently so that my parents couldn't hear my sniffling.

My friends think I need to start standing up for myself. I need to express my opinions. One sided conversations where all I do is listen and not say what I think is unhealthy for me and for my parents because then they start thinking I am OK when I'm really not. It leads to unreasonable expectations.

I wanted some advice on how to speak up when I know my opinion will get shot down. Is there anything I can do to increase my confidence? My fear of speaking up for myself is so intense...but I don't want this fear to continue controlling my life