I apologized if I am totally off but it sounds as he isn't particularly into sex at this point or into sex with you or he likes different kind of sex than you. But you insist that he initiates sex. So maybe he either does it to deliberately turn you off or to piss you off so you leave him alone or he actually enjoys control. You said when you two got married he did something that you didn't even want to do. Yet he still did. And you said nothing. You might not be compatible in sex.

Why don't you two find something to do together with no sex like join a class or have craft project or develop mutual hobby? Like why does it have to be about sex all the time? What do you like to do together?