Malady,
So sorry love seems to be triggering for you (religion also). In a way its triggering for us all. Deep inside i know I want to fight each time I say I forgive or accept myself. For me, its the most crucial step for me in recovery and a big one. Best of luck to you on your recovery!

Kimmydawn- I totally understand how its hard to accept and forgive yourself. I feel that way. Its so easy to justify. I am just taking one step forward each day though and getting up when I fall. Its the only thing I can do.