It's so hard to move out of the frozen wastelands of numbness. Sometimes I think it's because we believe if we let ourselves feel what we really feel deep down that we'll drown in our feelings. Maybe?
It truly does sound like depression and you seem like you're smart and self aware enough to recognize it. I hope you reach out for help--talk to your doc, a counselor, and the folks here on PC too. I accept that you're feeling really critical of yourself right now but I don't think you're the worst creature ever. Could you challenge that thought even just a little? Can you think of even one time when you were kind or encouraging to someone else? When you made a donation, stood up for a cause you believe in, maybe just gave someone who needed it a smile? I hope that may help you see yourself in a more compassionate light.

Btw, I am an off the charts INTJ too. It can be a challenge, but I figure if that's the worse problem I have, I'm having a really good day!
Hope you feel better soon