Beware this is just venting.

So hubby has a cold and is snoring when he sleeps so I slept on the couch. I had an uneasy feeling all night and I could not wait till hubby got up for work at 3:45am. When he got up I moved into the bedroom and grabbed my iPad. I have not heard from one of my lupus friends. He's older lives alone and has no family. Sometimes he gets mad at us and will not respond to our emails. He usually mellows out and calms down after a couple of weeks.

Well thanksgiving came and went and nothing. We all sent him emails but still nothing. Last night I couldn't sleep so when I got up I googled his name and to my horror his obituary popped up. I freaked out. I was crying and i could not breath.

I sent the obituary to my friends and to the moderator on the lupus forum. I asked him to find out if this was true. He posted it it's true. My heart is breaking and I know my BP is up and I can't stop crying.

He knew what I went through with my dad 2 years ago and he was trying to spare me but he died alone and no one should die alone. It's going to be along night.

The man did a lot to help people with lupus my heart can't take cub more.

Thank you for letting me vent.