I am really surprised about stigma you are talking about. I really dont understand. You aren't embarrassed that your husband drinks all night, treats you bad, doesn't work and does **** like contacting old girlfriends, yet you are embarrassed to get divorced. Divorce is so very common. .I've been divorced most of my adult life and never experienced stigma. You don't have kids so why would anyone even care if you are married or not?

Join bunch of meetups. go do stuff. Let your husband be irritated. What do you care. Next time you are going to movies with movie group and he is pissed you tell him that he can file for divorce. You know that he will not.

Do you see a therapist? That might be helpful