Quote:
Originally Posted by justafriend306
It seems to me, as you have described, it is the being on the receiving end that is the issue. Do you have expectations about the act? I don't perceive it as an obligation.
You may find taking charge of things to be just what you need to do. You dictate the scenario and direction things go. You dictate the speed of things and how far.
How is your self-esteem, your level of self worth? Do you feel worthy of such attention? Is the denial of gratification some way of punishing yourself? Are you dissappointed you are not having sex? When it comes to oral sex, do you feel doing this is out of a sense of obligation.
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Hi, thanks for replying.
Yes I am ok to give, (have given oral sex once and surprisingly enjoyed doing it) but receiving is the issue at hand. The thought of letting a guy I like take charge sends endless nerves through me, but at the same time I don't feel confident or 'experienced' enough to take charge either. His satisfaction (or potential lack thereof) is one factor. To answer your question I do have enough self worth, I believe I'm deserving of the right attention so it isn't my self esteem which is causing the awkwardness/anticipation - it is something else that I'm trying to place my finger on.
Yes I am disappointed I'm not having sex given most people my age have already, but I also get that it is different for everyone. As I am progressing through my 20's I don't want this fear to inhibit my life.