Quote:
Originally Posted by Misssy2
"I missed the signs of their and my mothers illness".
Hi, you are putting WAY too much pressure on yourself 
We have to remember that we are not God...and everything happens for a reason. We may not know the reason at the time of events like this...but sometimes that reason is revealed to us.
It could be that the intented reason for losing the mother of the bunnies was that you are in line to save another bunny or another animal.
It could be the intent was to have you quit your job for an upcoming wonderful experience and opportunity.
As far as the passing of your bunnies mother...I wish you could look at it like this...when a human gets sick....sometimes even the human itself ignores the signs of illness (you didn't ignore the signs of the bunnies sickness...you just didn't KNOW). And when a human is sick...everything possible is done to save the human but ya know...sometiimes nothing can be done and it is THAT persons "time" to pass.
For the mother of the bunnies....IF you knew the bunny was sick you may have done something different...but it doesn't mean that the bunny would have been saved....you are not God, you are not going to know possibly if even another bunny or dog is sick...but you DO know that as soon as you find out...you would do anything in your power to assist the animal in getting medical care and that still may not work. Death is a part of all life...and it is not your fault the bunny or your Mom passed on.
What is your guilt over your Mom? What do you think you could have possibly have done different? |
hi misssy2, I unfortunately don't believe in the concept of everything happens for a reason. I felt that if I only had done certain things, my mom and my bunnies might have lived longer.
my bunny was handicapped and became soiled so I had to give him a butt bath, even knowing bathing a bunny is very risky as they get cold and stressed easily and can die from the shock. but the soiling was bad. well, my bunny did go into shock from his butt bath because he did get cold. I tried to warm him up at home for 6 hours because I was afraid if I took him to the vet the stress of the car trip would push him over the edge. bunnies are prey animals and stress out very easily. i also thought he just needed warming up. he started to eat so I thought he was recovering. but then he relapsed and stopped eating and by then he really was too fragile to take to the vet. I wish I had taken him when he first went into shock...he died in my arms. he depended on me totally and I feel I let him down.
as for my mom, we each lived in our own place, although only a few minutes apart. I visited her every day. she was elderly but was spry and was even still driving. but I did worry about her living on her own. I would have moved in with her except her building did not allow pets. I could not see giving up my bunnies as I had had them for so long. they were like my kids. I had also gone through enormous guilt after i lost other bunnies a few years before so I did not want to go through any more bunny death guilt and was ultra careful with their care. rehoming a bunny is scary as it is hard to find a good, responsible bunny owner who won't just leave them in a cage. (mine are free roam) so mom said let's just keep the living arrangement as is. I begged her to come live with me but I don't think she wanted to live with 2 rabbits and also she loved her place. after her death, my sister told me she had told my mother not to move in with me, since she loved her place so. I wish she hadn't told my mom that. anyways, I told my mother I was worried I would find her dead on the floor one day. but she was not worried. i tried to get her a life alert system but she did not like that. i offered to install hand rails in her apartment but she rejected that. she had had a recurrence of her breast cancer so we had to go get a bone scan. I had googled the procedure and the article had said to drink lots of water after that kind of scan. the hospital had not instructed that. so I told mom to drink lots of water. the next day we went out and she was so unusually out of it. I called her later that day and she said that she had not had much sleep the night before because she had drunk 6 glasses of water and was going to the bathroom all night. omg.. I did not realize she was going to drink that much water.. anyways, the next day I was not feeling well and so I was late going to visit her. I found her on the floor of her bathroom. she was gone. if only I had moved in with her, I might have been there when she collapsed. if only i hadn't told her to drink that water as i later found out too much liquids can stress the heart. she had had a pressure in her chest a month before and we had gone to the er. the er doc said he did not see anything serious. I believe it was just something to do with her potassium levels. but my guard should have been up as my mom never complains so for her to complain about chest pains...I should have moved in with her right away. but I was so worried something would happen to my bunnies and that i would be deep in guilt again. I didn't even think of the simple solution of moving in with her and going to visit the bunnies. I only thought of that after she died. so I feel I did not do everything I could have to keep my mother safe. i really regret not moving in with her. i know people say even if i had been living with her i could have been out when she collapsed but at least i would have tried my darndest to keep her safe. my sis said I chose the bunnies over mom. (yes she can be cruel and blunt) I corrected her by saying I chose myself over mom...