I'm a people pleaser myself and I have placed myself in very bad predicaments because of it. I don't like to see people upset especially with me and I feel the need to help. I feel like I can help so I try and even when I try I still feel like i have done nothing.
It's funny that you say that because ever since I had sessions with my at I've been more aware of pleasing people even more than the norm for me. My grimness husband just passed at a very young age and lately I've been giving so much of myself and doing so much for her that I'm Almost losing myself. I went a little above and beyond today and I really shouldn't have because I've placed myself in a bad predicament so now I have to make things work for me.

i think that when we please people we lose ourselves a bit. It's important to make a mental note and remind ourselves that we count. Our happiness and opinions count. I'm thinking that we put everyone else first and ourselves last. I'm sure it's tied into our past. I guess we have to remember to place ourselves first and take care of ourselves in order for us to be able to help others when time comes. I've had to learn to say no and I'm getting better at it but I still fall for it.
I don't think it's fair for you to hold yourself liable for someone else's happiness. At a point like that try to accept that you've done the best you could do for someone.