The trauma I'm dealing with now is more brutal than my first trauma. Pursuing the journey of forgiving my mother is one of the hardest things I've ever done. She's toxic, our "relationship" is toxic, and I've reached a point in my life where I am FULLY READY to get away from my mother for good. This whole process is slow and painful. I can feel who I feel I am being stripped away slowly. Now I'm not sure who I am, but I feel much different than earlier this year.