i have the same question- what do i do with this now?

i blocked out most of my life from 0-10 years old. now its slowly coming back to me. my T uses the dam metaphor a lot... talking about trauma is like letting a little bit of water out of the dam slowly, plugging it up when it gets too much. he says we have to be careful about the water gushing through uncontrollably... which is what is happening now.

like, ok, all this ****** stuff happened. what now?? where do i go from here.

a lot of the time i regret ever starting therapy... i had no idea it would be this way. i miss being simple minded and ignorant about myself and my deep rooted issues... yeh i was a huge drug addict near death, but i thought that was just what i wanted in life. i had no idea i was running from so much bad stuff