Well it's been over a year since I last caught him. He's been very patient and sweet since then. I know what you mean, though. I often think about how my life would be if I had been strong enough to walk away the first time he cheated. I don't have the option to leave him anymore though. We have a baby on the way which is part of the reason I want to fix myself. I feel like this time around I'm the one messing up our relationship because I can't move on. He's changed so much in the past year that I hate myself for not being happy.