Well... I took a quick look at the two vid's you posted links for (didn't actually watch them.) But I can certainly imagine how watching that sort of thing could make a person who struggles with gender dysphoria feel bad! I have some thoughts with regard to this. But I won't get into that here simply due to length-of-post considerations. (If you wanted to correspond further about this, you could personal message me.)

I'm an older person now... really old! But I've struggled with gender dysphoria (MtF) since before I even have any reliable memories as a child. But way back when I was young, the terms transgender & transsexual hadn't even been coined yet. The internet didn't exist. And, at least where I grew up, people simply didn't talk about anything related to sex. And gender was simple. You were either a boy or you were a girl. And if you didn't happen to fall neatly into one of those categories, you darned well kept it to yourself if you knew what was good for you! So I just grew up hiding feeling weird & sort-of smutty. And as time went on, it just became sort-of a habit.

No, my gender dysphoria has never gone away. As has sometimes been said: if you're truly trans, you're trans for life. It never goes away. At this point in my life, I'd say it's no longer the "compulsion" it used to be. But all I have to do is scratch the surface, so to speak, & it's right there. No, I never transitioned. I've lived a more-or-less "normal" male life. But it has been difficult.

I've also pretty-much always also struggled with depression & major anxiety issues. In fact, I don't know if being transgender caused me to develop depression & anxiety, or if my gender dysphoria was simply one component of a broader mental illness that also included depression & anxiety. It all simply goes too far back into my childhood for it to ever be sorted out. I went back into the closet, following my one effort to poke my head out, because realistically it was too late to do anything about it & it was just easier to resume the façade than it would have been to come out of the closet any further.

I do think it would be great if you could talk with your therapist about your gender concerns. Perhaps it may be different for you. But, for me, this has been a huge obstacle in my life I have never actually been able to get past.