Quote:
Originally Posted by Skeezyks
I personally know this is far from the worst period in my life. In fact, objectively, this is probably one of the best in a lot of ways. Sometimes I'll see news reports, or read posts here on PC, regarding the terrible things that happen to people. And I realize how incredibly fortunate I've been by comparison.  But I still get seriously disheartened realizing that my life is almost over & this is what I have to show for it.
I think at least part of the problem is that what I'm experiencing in the present is right here now. While, stuff that happened in the past, is just memories. I liken it to the difference between being in a storm versus watching one from a distance.  Even if the storm one is in isn't the worst possible, it's going to seem more so than a more intense storm viewed from a distance... if that makes any sense...  At least that's the way it seems to me... 
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You are very hard on yourself. I am sure you deserve whatever peace you have in your life, and believe me, not struggling is nicer than struggling with an uncertain future. I would trade places with you any day. Please don't be so hard on yourself.