Sorry to hear you're having a rough time.

I think the fears we have are always worse than what the reality is. I say that to say that fearing to tell your psychiatrist something is a lot worse than what telling them would do. They have the tools to help you, but you gotta be willing to be open and honest with them. The next time you go, tell them everything (even about your fear o telling them).

In any case, I hope you get it sorted.