your battle is very familiar. I too fight the demon of doubt. I wish I had a solution for you, but that would be a lie. Some days, the demon is quieter and I am more able to function; but there are days when my mind is less engaged in the present... that the demon grows louder and gets more and more control. So, I try to stay focused and engaged in the present... I don't know that it fixes anything... maybe a bandaid?