I told my dad that I felt like I don't want to go on any longer but I couldn't tell my mom about wanting to take the pills. I thought I might be starting to feel better but I'm feeling rigidly stuck in this depression.

Depression for me is usually a week-long phenomenon. It started four days ago so there's still time for it to go away. Thanks for being interested in how I am doing.

This afternoon me and my mom made a birthday card for my Dad. Usually I am such a creative person when it comes to making cards but today I could barely find the patience. I am not having as many thoughts about taking pills but have some psychomotor agitation - i feel like i just want to get up and move and it's hard to sit still.

I will keep posting on here periodically.