I also believe that ultimately it is my task to use whatever I get out of therapy in my own life and that if the lessons, conclusions, effects etc remain between my therapist and I only, it's pretty useless. For me, whatever comes of that relationship is only a starting point for changes in my mental landscape and implementation in everyday life. Some of us use the relationship with the therapist as a model. I am not interested in staying in therapy just for the sake of having a good, controlled relationship with a professional if I cannot translate it into anything useful... and that I have to do, the T cannot by definition. So in this sense, the onus is definitely on me to make therapy work in the larger context of myself and my life.

As for between the T and client, I think it's a two-way construct even if the T does not do anything but listens. It is some sort of collaboration even if it's riddled with conflicts.