I've been living with PTSD for a long time. I hardly sleep because of nightmares and being hyper-alert. My PTSD comes from being savagely, wish I was kidding, every day and from military service. I've been married and divorced three times. They were all gold diggers but I'm sure PTSD was a factor on my part. I haven't seen my two daughters in 7 years and that is killing me more each day.

I'm kind to people and help others a lot, but I live a solitary life because women, not all I'm sure, want nothing to do with me. Is it my looks? Is it because they think I'm unstable from PTSD? I wish I knew. The VA counseling system is terrible. So many foreign doctors that barely comprehend English. I've had counselors scream at me because I didn't agree with something they said. There aren't any medications to help with this.

I'm tired of being alone, lost, and barely surviving. I wear my veteran hat and I've had people spit on me. We soldiers sacrificed a lot to protect our people, our home and freedom, only to be left alone to rot. I grow more angry every day. Mostly I'm just tired, so very tired from the inside out.