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She has mental health issues.

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Having put myself in the position of your friend so many times in my own life, I think she is trying to reach out to re-establish your friendship.

It has often taken me months (even years) to realize that I had been the instigator/sabateur in a fall-out with friends/family. It has also taken me that long to get over the humiliation of my actions, knowing that I had caused much pain to those I care about.

Unfortunately, this is the "life-cycle" of a person with certain types of mental illnesses (BPD for one). Maintaining long-term friendships becomes next to impossible, specifically for the reasons you mentioned in your post.

I think it is important for you to consider at this point, whether you can ascertain if the behaviours were as a result of her illness interfering with her thoughts/feelings, or if this is part of her "real" personality (some people are just ****disturbers by nature, know what I mean?) and that you are accepting of this as part of your friendship with her.

This is the perfect opportunity to rid yourself of someone you may no longer want in your life (even if they have a mental illness) and to do it with some dignity and closure. That's an opportunity we rarely get with most relationships these days, I find.

I have had to end a few friendships because I could not deal with both my own issues and theirs as well, especially when the relationship is constantly triggering me.

I think it's good that you are responding with words of "friendship" to encourage her, as this is definitely what she is looking for from you. If she is like me, she will most likely not contact you again if she does not get a response of some sort. She is also more open to facing up to what she did now more than ever.

Just be sure that you really want to continue this relationship as this sort of thing may happen again.

Although I do not have any words for you, I thought maybe you would want to consider the unique position you are in.

(I hope this didn't come off as cold and heartless, though).