Ok. I'm having a tough time with an analytical part of me that wants answers and reasons/explanations.

Luce, I have read your post too many time and that part of me is not getting it. That part wants more. I don't really have words.

I met with my counselor tonight and we talked about it. That part of me blocks any understanding of it.

This part, "What I have learned from my own experience is that if I depend on actual verification of the validity of the memories my others bring me before I will grant myself permission to accept their inner truth, then I will never be able to heal. The verification will never happen."

Please forgive me. I feel stupid because I don't understand what that means.