hon all I can tell you is at this point let him do whatever he is able to do. losing dignity is such a big thing as we all know. I do agree if he is messing up his clothes and stuff to keep him in the diapers. it sounds like he is a very proud man and it gets to him. as far as feeling guilty? don't. you are doing what you can. and hon they all push away the ones they love the most. I am sure he talked to his handyman about how he is feeling knowing he is dying. my mom never talked to me about how she was feeling but did my cousin. hang in there hon.