Quote:
Originally Posted by divine1966
I think the only way to get through this marriage and remain sane is to disengage, not to engage in arguments and spend less time together. Like since there are no kids at home, I wouldn't come home at 5pm, I'd get a second job or go to gym every night and arrive home right before night is over, wash and eat and sleep. I wouldn't come home early and wouldn't hang out every night. On the weekends I'd hang out with girlfriends. Or work second job, and attend Alan on meetings.
That's all I can advice. If the person can't or won't leave, there is nothing else they can do but disengage
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I think this is good solid advice - when me and H had a stressful patch many years ago this was what I did to get through the worst of it, disengage and get busy with other stuff -we were clashing all the time and that disengagement gave us space. We did come together the other side of it.
All of the things Divine describes could well give you that mental space you need to breathe and work out where to go from here.
Sometimes a bit of space works wonders.