I, personally, don't consider someone an alcoholic unless they think they are or they're causing problems, for themselves or others. However, just because someone else (say a spouse) says they are a problem to that someone else, doesn't necessarily mean they are; I'd want an "independent" or other person to agree. Getting a DUI and/or having a boss complain, etc. would make me think someone is going the party-too-hardy route.

My T would occasionally ask me if I was concerned with my drinking. That, I guess would be the biggest indication of the difference. Wouldn't matter which one was if one didn't feel they had a problem they were willing to address. People with multiple DUI's and jail time, etc. who go on about their "bad luck" rather than their "bad judgment", doesn't matter what you call them. Sad sorts of people who self-medicate with liquor or otherwise drink to excess, putting their health in danger. . . likewise.