T1 began to handle boundaries in a more and more withdrawing way because I was attached to him and he was struggling to handle my feelings. I felt worse than when I started. There was more going on in his personal life which contributed and I wasn't getting effective therapy any more. It's nothing to do with him being a good or bad person or anything. It wasn't working. I wasn't getting therapy.
The question I had to ask myself (and I believe we should all ask ourselves in therapy) is "is this therapeutic?". And like my situation with T1, what you describe doesn't sound therapeutic.
I left. It was traumatic, painful and like re-experiencing traumatic loss all over again. I mourned him for a year. But it was the best decision I ever made for myself and my therapy. I'm so glad I took that step. So while it is immediately more traumatic to leave, if you can weather that storm with the solid support of a good therapist, it will get better. I no longer wish for any kind of relationship with T1.
Sending you