I've just read through this thread and recalled some other things you said on other threads, Skies. You mentioned that this therapist was very helpful for you in a few ways in the past - that is good. But more recently it seems like he's been triggering a lot of pain with the strategies he is using (whether with your best interest in mind or defensively). What I would consider in such a situation is whether it's useful for me to continue with him, keeping my current needs and goals in mind. It is perhaps not necessary to question his competency in general, maybe more that he was helpful in a certain period and for some things, but it does not mean he'll be helpful forever and with everything. Also, relationships are dynamic, change and evolve over time. Sometimes they expire in spite of being great in the past. I would probably evaluate what more potential benefits you could have from this therapy, and if you have ideas, discuss it with the T. If he is no longer willing or able to support you and provide help, for whatever reason, and it's not just a momentary state but persists, maybe consider stopping. This may vary among clients but I personally think that no therapy is a better option than constantly stressful, harmful therapy. I think that a therapy that hurts more than it relieves over a long period is most likely not done well or is not a good match.

I mentioned in other discussions before that I used to have a psychoanalyst who was quite rigid in his views and methods. It was interesting and helpful for a while but then stopped being beneficial and actually made me worse and worse in a particularly stressful and difficult period. He also handled between-sessions communication in a very erratic way. Like you, I wondered if it was about me and he was just trying to find the best approach working with me at that time. I kept looking for fault within but in the end I felt convinced that most of it was not about me but his own insecurities and... well, not having the background and skills to work outside of his beliefs. I'm not suggesting that you do the same but for me stopping at that point and not pushing it further turned out a really good solution. I then found another T who is very consistent and more compatible with me in many ways, including focusing on strengths, improvements and positives in the present, instead of looking for faults and negatives in my history all the time.

Again, just my opinion, but I think that model of psychoanalysis that it has to go on for many years is really outdated. I think it is often more effective to use approaches and therapists that are suitable for whatever state and concerns we have at a given period of life. It's not like they are blood relatives that we are stuck with for life and need to adopt to because there is no choice.

You seem to think that this T cannot help you and you are not improving... are you sure this is the case, and not the other way around? That the T was helpful for a while but actually you may have surpassed him and his toolkit? Maybe why he behaves in such a defensive manner, not explaining things to you etc. I would always be very cautious drawing conclusions about someone I only "see" in very limited ways online but if there is any impression I could get from your posts here, it's that you don't come across as a negative person at all. You also do not appear cynical fro your posts. But you do display a keen sense of complexity, depth and a very analytical mind. I can easily imagine that the way you tap into and question things in a gentle but sharp way might make a therapist feel internally intimidated, someone who is only superficially confident in his abilities and skill set. Might be why he says he would not work outside of the frame and why he withdraws parts of the therapy that he is not able to handle at this time. And what you said on another thread, that the T mostly keeps pointing out negativity in you just does not seem to compute for me, it does not seem to match the person who is making these posts