Sorry your therapist told you that you were the 'only" one too.
It reallly hurts. I do wonder if this is defensive more than anything else, or maybe said out of frustration.
I have been giving myself much of the blame. Less for my actions, but more for just for being me. Like this is how I am expecting to be treated, as no one could care enough to stay with me when I am at my worst. Only when I have something to give.
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Originally Posted by JaneTennison1
All relationships can "go wrong" it's very easy to see a person and how great their other relationships are looking in. You diagnose yourself as the prblem "he's not like this with other ppl so it must be me" that way you have a false sense of control. If you get it wrong then you can get it right somehow. The truth is that it takes 2 ppl in any relationship and he is responsible for this failure. Perhaps even more so in this situation.
I know it is hard to hear because you may feel attached to who he was before and not who he is now, but the best thing you can do is find someone who can really help. What you need is not wrong but he cannot help you with that. Maybe he did but he doesn't seem to now.
I hope you are well. You deserve so much healing.
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Originally Posted by JaneTennison1
Btw my ex T was a fan of saying I was the "only" person who needed whatever. It was shaming and made me feel horrible. I found a new T who stated that I was by no means her only client who wanted certain things (hugs or emails) and whatever it was she wouldn't reject me. It was a liberating and freeing.
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