I had a huge crisis today at work, where I almost felt like crying. Apart from strong hierarchical system that I don't seem to fit in and the constant The Big Brother Is Watching thing (it's a huge corporation and we're constantly controlled) where I'm not sure how to act always (for example, when there is no work to do and people can go and talk a bit but still there is a pressure bc you need to pretend to do something and you never know how far you can go), well, I had, again, come to conclusion that I feel like there is a glass wall between me and other people.

But now I now it's also because, like, many people approach me and they're friendly and nice, but no matter how much I try, I just cannot bounce this energy back. It's mostly because of my harsh expression.