So lately I've started being able to get better control of my anxiety. I've realized that I'm actually a stronger person than I previously thought when it comes to handling my emotions. That's really been a positive discovery for me. I haven't felt depressed for about a month now, and I'm starting to enjoy life the way I usually have.

And while I am feeling better, I do feel a tad down and worried about my future. I'm 32, single, no job, no car, living with my parents. Growing up, particularly in my twenties I was terrified this is how I'd end up and I don't want to be.

Mind you, I'm taking steps to take care of my situation. 2017 hasn't even been around that long and I've already applied to about 30 jobs, have had four interviews, and I have my next interview scheduled for tomorrow. It's also not like I've never held a job before. I've had two in the past, the last one being last year. I'm also trying to get out there and meet people. (Hard to do in the cold winter months but I'm trying.) Also, while nothing is set in stone yet, a friend of mine have been in talks of possibly having an apartment in a year or so.

But despite all of this, I feel worried for my future. I sometimes feel like I've had a pathetically slow start. That I'm a loser. That stereotypical basement dweller. It's kind of discouraging.

I sometimes feel like it's way too late to make anything of myself. I honestly expected to be completely independent, have a car, a job, and a wife, and children by this point. On my best days this will make me feel blue. On the worst days, I'll feel like I've just wasted my whole life and that I'll never be anything more than what I am now - which isn't much.

With everything I'm doing to become independent, am I being way too hard on myself? At age 32, do I still have plenty of time to get all the things I want? I feel like I've run out of time 2 years ago, and I don't know if I'm being realistic or not.

A part of me doesn't want to send this. A part of me feels like typing this proves that I'm a pathetic loser. But I'll post it. And again, I have been emotionally better overall. I guess I'm just looking for some assurance that I'm perfectly capable of being a normal adult family guy like many other people are. Instead of being a man-child which I'm sometimes terrified that that's what I'm becoming.