Freewill,

Your following statement was a WOW for me.

"so she transplanted that fear into me.. but I was too stuborn to allow it to stop me.."

Yes, my mother tried to make me fearful too.

I have looked at issues with my mother at many points in my life, and I find it hard to believe at age 60, I'm still cleaning out my box, and looking at some things which are really embedded and painful to look at. Sigh...

EJ