Not everyone gets that kind of upbringing, just the way things are. I'm not saying that to invalidate your situation or the hell you've been through, as I've gone through a very similar path myself. You already took the step of looking for help, that's something to be proud of because it's difficult as hell. I noticed you commented on my post on the SoA forum. So, I'll reply to you here and just mix the two responses. What I did today, by telling my T what has happened to me, briefly (I didn't go into extreme detail), I opened myself up for the first time allowing someone outside of this site to really look into me. Really look. It took almost five months for me to be comfortable enough to do that. I had to be absolutely sure that this was the guy I was going to expose that part of me to. There's a lot of shame within those memories and a lot of self-hate. I don't expose people to that side of me, ever. Doing it took a lot out of me, today. You don't have to go that far in your first session. You can keep it as basic as, "I've dealt with a good amount of childhood trauma that I'm not comfortable talking about just yet," and if they're a good therapist, they understand this. Hell, you might not even have to tell them that much. Hopefully, they're a certified trauma therapist. That will make this process a lot better in regards to your mental health.

Welcome to PC, by the way.