Hello Elmay ... I'm new here also, and I know exactly what you are experiencing. I am not going through what you are experiencing right now, but I have in the past. My problem was diagnosed as a social phobia. I couldn't talk to people, and I couldn't go anywhere. I always thought everyone was judging me. Finally, I decided to do something about it. That was a big step for me. Believe it or not, the condition is treatable.

I found a good psychologist who did a written test (the MMPI), and he recommended that I talk to my doctor about getting on a medication. We explored my past and figured out why I was feeling the way I felt. He helped me take baby steps to confront my issues...one little "assignment" at a time. It didn't take very long before I was challenging myself even more.

At first, I thought that just because I understood what caused my problem didn't make it go away. No...it doesn't help instantly. However, over time with guidance, medication, and challenging yourself, you will grow and develop into a different person. Do I still have issues? Yes, I have some depression and need medication adjustments now and then...but I'm not experiencing any of the symptoms that you mentioned anymore. Please take that first big step and call a psychologist. You will be so glad that you did. Best of luck to you!