Good on you Kim for expressing your reaction rather than stewing about it silence. That's so important to be able to put feelings on the table.

Consider this... men tend to want to fix things. When faced with problems they can't fix (your daughters illness) they look for something familiar. Something 'normal' to calm their anxiety. This trip is an annual event that he would 'normally' do. Since he can't do anything to fix the problems at home he looks for some sign that things will be okay.... that life will be 'normal' again. If he goes on the trip he can tell himself everything is okay.

I think a good point has already been made about communcating to him your need for him to be there to support you through this time. He needs to see how he can help 'fix' things by supporting you through these stressful days. Making sure he knows that there is an important role for him to play that he can't abandon may cause him to be more inclined to act accordingly. If you have carried the bulk of the load up till now and he's been sidelined to waiting then him wanting a distraction while he waits is pretty natural.

I continue to pray for your daughter and your family through these difficult times. May you all have the strength you need to carry the burden.

Blessings Kim.......