Quote:
Originally Posted by I.Am.The.End.
Mr. Stranger, as I'm sure you know, I relate to quite a bit of your story. Oddly enough, I've felt like a stranger in my own country and region of said country, of which I've always lived. I was convinced that I would be treated badly if I went somewhere with a different subculture, which probably wasn't true.
I was really isolated during my first graduate degree, so I understand what that's like. I was very creative and surprisingly productive during that period, but I also had to be medicated in order to not hurt myself and others (ok, I still hurt myself regardless).
I don't know what the answer is though. Maybe it does have something to do with finding the right place/culture? I have no idea. :-/
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I did my Master degree in yet another country, but the culture and language were similar to mine. So, I didn't feel as isolated. In my PhD everything was different. The culture, the language, the weather, ... etc.
I've always had problems in concentration, but I didn't suffer from it as I did during my PhD. It was very difficult for me to read articles especially on computers (I'm sensitive to light), to keep going on one problem, be organized, ... etc. I was stressed out that I wouldn't finish. I couldn't handle the stress properly, and I internalized it negatively.
Also the nature of my work after graduation was somewhat depressing. I was sitting in an office alone for 8 hours doing research and reading articles. So, it didn't help my depression to work, but I didn't have the pressure I had during my PhD.
I think I need to change at least the nature of my job. I'm trying to go to the industry because I think it's more stimulating than the academia.