I relapsed too. It's humiliating. People at the meetings DO judge. I'm tired of people telling me it's something in AA I didn't do right. Somehow I failed the program. Hey AA, maybe You failed me! AA lowers my self-esteem. They are obsessed with sober 'time.' But AA has lots of good things about it too. It does not have a high success rate , but I have managed to put together time by going to the meetings every day. It just gets boring but they know a lot about staying sober. I'll probably go back but I'm not doing 90 in 90...surveys shows that leads to binge using. AA is famous for people bingeing when they go out.