I had initially wondered why there wasn't a group of wives that get together for support from his own department but honestly after the verbal threats & abuse he has spoken to you I wouldn't go for support to any place that wasn't confidential.

Just curious, have you ever suffered with depression before now? I ask this because of my own experience with SITUATIONAL depression. After loosing my career, I ended up trapped in a bad marriage that financially I couldn't get out of. The blame for the depression got attached to my loss of career when in reality it was being trapped it the bad marriage. The situation got worse without having my escape in my career & the depression grew increasingly dark to the point I was totally disabled by it. The situation of being trapped in a bad marriage can create desperately dark depression.

With what you have said about your marriage & your situation & the verbal threat abuse it's no wonder you are experiencing depression. I found out that medication does not help situational depression because there isn't a med in the world that can FIX the bad situation.

I wish I had left my bad marriage when I had my career to support myself. I think with the threats you have received from your husband that domestic violence contact for help & direction is your best solution for not only your safety but also your own mental health wellness in mind.

If there was REAL LOVE felt for you by your husband you would feel a closeness in spite of his excuse of being too tired. Too often we think this lack of emotional closeness is normal & excuse it away but in reality if it is there, there is no excuse needed because it JUST NATURALLY EXISTS. An emotionally connection is felt even through exhaustion we just get suckered by people into thinking its not when they need to excuse it away because they really aren't feeling it.