i've known i wasn't cis for the longest time, and many times ive managed to convince substitute teachers to refer to me by an 'incorrect name' or that i should be placed with the [redacted] group instead of my assigned gender group (i'd.. rather not state my assigned gender.. sorry)

but honestly if anything my gender seems to be out of apathy.
i have no real motivation to call myself a girl nor to call myself a boy. my gender is. there. i can't put a label to it?

does this mean im a transtrender? i've seen many people call 'third genders' a new trend for children wanting to be special.

i sometimes quite literally feel like a voided gender. there's nothing there in the terms of an identity. am i valid? please be honest.

they/them comforts me a lot, but im afraid to let myself get too comfortable with that identity, as it is a very unpopular alternative in places outside the internet...