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It's a mixed state/episode. Some of it may feel good and right, but it's all bad. Try not to give in to any urges (including talking more than strictly necessary). Are you on any meds (for these problems), a mood stabiliser or antipsychotic? Are you taking any antidepressants? Any problems with colleagues? You may want to call in sick if you do. Contact a/your psychiatrist or GP.
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Mania kills cells. Brain cells die. Memories become more reduced conceptually, making more efficient use of limited means. Memories shape our reality. Our memories are more or less split in two by abstractions, conceptual reductions. Mood states with memories, concepts, attached. Memories of pain and those of joy. It causes instability, changeability. Fearing that will leave an emptiness between pain and joy and a greater divide.
See Me, Feel Me, Touch Me, Heal Me.
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