I don't even know where this post should go - there is no anger management link. I don't know if i switched or not... I can't get into chat to join the holiday support chat, and even if i could, monday is waaaaaaaaaaay too far away.

I live with my mom- she's 60-ish, i'm 30-ish, and we just got into yet another fight over thanksgiving. I HATE the holidays. I hate having to go through this every year. Well, this year I am on a special medical diet and I can't have anything. We agreed that we would cook around my diet needs. Then she added in this, then that, then more things. Now it is the full meal deal and it's like I don't exist. She can't understand how hard it is for me to be in a household that is having all my very favorite foods in the whole world and not be able to have any. She keeps saying "surely you can have a bite. it;s not right for you not to have any." Hello - it's called ALLERGIC! I CAN'T have it. On top of all this, she's making an entire turkey dinner complete with mashed potatos, gravy, stuffing, pies, cranberry sauce, etc. etc... and taking it all over to her boyfriends the next day. - and leaving me left overs which I can't eat. the woman doesn't even have a job and can't buy regular groceries, but she's going to do this anyway.
Well, I lost my temper completely. We argued, she denied everything. I said loudly, I'm DONE. She said something back to me (i don't even know what) and i trew my slipper over my shoulder. Knowing it missed, (and not being the one in charge) i turned and directly threw my other slipper at her. I was shaking with my fists balled up and crying. it has been 3 or 4 years since the last time i was like this. And I'm being blammed for everything - my being DID makes any actions that "don't seem to fit" be "not me". "I knew you werent't being you." BS. This IS apart of me.
And I'm so mad on top of this because now i can't get my needs met - I'm really hungry and can't get anything to eat now. I'm freezing and can't get to the hotwater because it's in her room (to fill a hot water bottle). what a mess. Now i just have me -crying- to suffice. She just came to my locked door a minute ago to talk. i said no. She talked through it anyway. "I'm sorry I hurt you". she always says the same thing these days. which translates to "I'm sorry, but your needs don't matter as much as mine and when you're "you" again, you'll behave better."
why do i still live here?!!? Why am i most the time 1 16 yr old in an adult's body? Why can't i get out of here and away from her?!?!