Raceka, I completely understand your struggles with the holidays. When I was growing up the holidays were filled with abuse. At one point in time, my friend and I would literally leave the country--take a holiday.

I still struggle with holidays, but it is getting better. I have a "second" family (long story) that I love very much. This set of parents are very loving and they go out of their way to make the holidays good for me. I am one of the lucky ones. As hard as it is for me, I am trying real hard to look at the positive...but, overall, I would still just rather be at home alone.

Please know you are not alone...