there are a lot of lonely hurting souls out there ... how to find them ... that is the question ... but I am 100% certain the start is a good self esteam ... if you like yourself others will too ... then you need to be where people can meet ... so you must be out going or at least willing to put yourself out there to be seen ...

both of those are really tough .... maybe start small and make yourself interesting (so others will find you that way) ... join a club ... visit a church .. take up a hobby (painting .. trains... anything to get out of the house) ... remember you are looking for specific qualities in another and they are too ... you can not be everything to everyone ... nor can they be everything to you ...

they are just as lonely and lost of what to do as you are ... maybe they need encouragment too ... guys can have feeling and fears just like anyone else ...

ps; don't want to sound polly-anna , and I have plenty of issues myself ... but a "real" relationship can only be started by someone that "really" wants it ... and is willing to work at it ... it is your life after all .... I wish you much sucess and happiness in whatever you choose ... Tigger