I am she may never specifically ask but she is in a space right now that is so dangerous, so different from me, that I can't help but feel that this will not be an equal give and take relationship and thus I feel like i am barking down the wrong tree. She has a lot of growing up to do.

She is 5 years younger than me and
- lives with her mother.
- lives in a home where she has rats (and won't do anything)
- is so poor that she has her wages garnished for her student debt
- has never had sex or any sort of sexual activity
- she cannot drive
- the kicker, she admits freely that she is afraid of doing things and will never change any of this.
- When her elderly mother dies, which is obviously going to happen, she will be in dire straights because social security supports them all.

My heart does does go out to her but even if I would be willing to assist her I can't because she MUST learn to do these things for herself. But you wonder exactly why is she talking to me. It doesn't take a genius to think she wants help of one kind or another. So why am I talking to her. Boredom... a sense of obligation.. perhaps at first I hoped I could influence her but the more she speaks the more I realize it is hopeless. Being there for her will only keep her from taking on her very real problems and perhaps... she will want me to help.

Last year I broke of a similar situation. That person had, by the time she stared talking to me, been basically drummed out of her employment (she was in a union) and was living on borrowed time before being evicted from her apartment. But instead of focusing on that... she took what money she had left and went to Florida for a vacation. After that happened like 4 times and she continued to rage and the injustice of being called out on her poor behavior and not addressing the fact that she needed a job and need to do something... I broke it off because her complaining to me was actually enabling her to continue to ignore her situation.