I think, as people get older, they naturally have their attention more absorbed by the growth of their family, especially the arrival of grandchildren. In my case, I have neither kids, or grandchildren. But caring for my sig. other, who has, increasing health issues is taking up more and more of my time.

The aquaintences who have gotten needy, I notice, are the ones who either don't have kids and, especially, grandkids to focus on . . . . or the ones whose families don't really want to be too bothered with them. My neighbor has grandkids, but she doesn't take that much interest in them, or vice versa. Adult kids often are doing their own thing and don't require a lot of parental attention. I've noticed there are grandmothers whose kids won't leave them with the grandchildren - like they're incompetent to even babysit. These women seem to have big holes in their lives.

Then there are women who sow discord in their families, and, after a while, they get ignored as troublemakers. I've known some like that who are looking to glom on to someone outside their family who'll put up with them.

I'm even starring to figure that, married or single, people whose relatives shun them are very apt to have darn good reason that they do so. I used to feel so sorry for a few whose families neglected them on holidays. One person like that I know who thinks she's my bosom buddy has just gotton herself demoted permanently in my mind down to "acquaintence to be avoided." I almost feel like telling her, "You like to needle people and play headgames of one upsmanship. No wonder your family invites you to nothing. I don't need that in my life either."

As I get older, I find myself coveting the rare "alone" time I can have just for me. Being a primary caregiver to an ill man, I'm not so interested in hearing from needy people.