Maybe it is insecure people having a Plan B.

I've spent way too much time thinking about this ex boyfriend. When I married my h, I was glad to leave all the exes behind. But when the marital problems began, I reached out for him, fantasized about him, dreamed him into someone he probably even is not.

Now we're in a good place. I'm thinking about him way less. That drama has played out. No harm done.