I was going through some old posts and came across this one. Crazy how things have changed and I’ve put a stop to the vicious cycle.
In response to hypermic’s response.. I was self-medicating. For me I was running from things that I didn’t deal with that happened in my past and trying to numbing all the pain I felt. I didn’t know how to handle the negative feelings I was going through. Especially the feelings of rejection and not fitting in.
Today I still deal with negative emotions, but through drug/alcohol treatment and therapy I’m learning how to handle them in a much healthier way.