I used to I'm not going to put which exactly because I don't want anyone getting any ideas. I had the same overwhelming urges as you, too. It's not worth it, though because you have to deal with the pain for days afterwards, depending on how deep you went. Right now, I'm currently recovering from self-harming. It's not easy, you have to have a lot of self control. So far I'm doing good. It also helps to keep your hands busy. It may seem childish, but I have a tangle that helps. I'd also recommend a fidget cube. Here are some other alternatives that might help you when you're feeling that overwhelming urge. Hope I've helped. Stay safe and take care.

Throne