"But I don't want some lame stuff non-lethal that mostly women choose."

I respect your opinion and free will. This discussion is interesting

I looked at your links. At times in my life, I have read Buddhist teachings and meditated. I should fear death because I attended a fire and brimstone church during my youth but despite that, have not had much of a fear of death for many years. Funny, when I was revived, I thought maybe there is a God after all because it's a miracle I'm here. And maybe I wouldn't have gotten so hopeless if I had just believed and obeyed many of the things I had learned in church. I certainly believe in the butterfly effect. So I only thought of one good effect but there would have been many more negative effects plus I can now he available to help in many other ways for years to come. Someone in my family could have a crisis which is best handled with patience and face to face time, etc. Remember, sometimes when we are suicidal, we mistakenly believe that the world would be a better place without us. It might be faulty thinking....