okay so... heres the latest in my venting:

first off, im having repeated sexual thoughts about men suddenly but i dont want thta i just guess suddenly women who i found attractive for so long look like different to me. but i dont ever want to do this in real life, and refuse to masterbate or anything to men cause i think its gross and i dont want that for myself. the reason why i list masterbation/porn watching is because the ejeacualtion factor and maybe porn is just messing with me or something. is this possibly just a phase? i dont know. I WANT TO BE MARRIED to a WOMAN. do most college guys go through this. HELP!