I was on a slippery sloop downwards which ended in "ward 4" (psyche ward) as id had a psychotic breakdown at eighteen. The only person who stuck by without judging me was my then boyfriend, ill call him freddy.
I did some crazy things. Ending in a suicide scrawl over my bedroom wall. I was going to hang myself. For some reason i had some kind of defence mechanisms kicking in. The nurses would leave my meds at the sink, as if they were scared of me. I was now officialy dubbed a "psycho"

People told my boyfriend i wasn't worth it, run a mile, think what people will say. My doctor thankfully never diagnosed me as a schizophrenic. My parents think i am bi polar to this day, i doubt ill ever tell them. The doctor was actually very nice, and I'm thankful it was her, but they seemed to forget i was an adult.

So my life has been a chaotic mess for ten years. I don't know how i ever managed to be lucid